Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Sheen Shuns Sense & Sensibility

image credit: buzzfed
Because that's how he and his sloth pals roll?

I'm amazed by all the creativity on the web just trying to make sense of the latest missives from actor Charlie Sheen.
But I think its an impossible task:
On drugs
“I am on a drug. It’s called 'Charlie Sheen'.
It’s not available. If you try it once, you will die.
Your face will melt off...”

On beating addiction
“I closed my eyes and made it so with the power of my mind
...AA. It’s a silly book written by a broken-down fool.”

On his own in-home rehab
“...that we labeled the Sober Valley Lodge.
… its primary client achieved radical success.”

On discussing his behavior with his kids
“Talk about an education. And then, like, this, and then that’s the guy, and that’s our dad and we can get all the answers and the truth? Wow, 'winning!'...”

On being special
“I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA.”

On being tired
“I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.”

On life
“...my life is so much more bitchin’ than yours. I planned it this way.”

"...I am special. I will never be one of you."

On what people think
“If people think I’m insane...
I have no interest in their retarded opinions.
I’m gonna live my life the way I want... they can just find the most comfortable chair in their small house and sit back and enjoy the show.”
Enjoy? Not the word I'd choose.

(hardly a poster-boy for Miss Manners, is he?)

His poor kids. All -five- (!) of them.

For any with the courage to wade thru more:
more of ScreenJunkies Sheen quotes, so far...
spearhead's unique Sheen click-on Audio Board.
The LA Times' Charlie Sheen Dictionary.
Or go here for more Sloth Sheen screenshots by buzzfed. image credit: buzzfed

ETA - Charlie Sheen's strong moral code:

Howard Stern announced a 'Charlie Sheen Beauty Pageant' for his Thursday show, with the girls that Charlie used to pay to have sex with. Charlie wasn’t amused and said he felt burned by the girls.

Sheen said “Shame on you…” to the girls.

Now I'm truly speechless.

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  1. I think the best part is how he puts down all the commoners (oh, I mean "Middle America") who made him who he is (come on - there's no fame if there are no fans) and just expects that they will hear his babble and suddenly a light bulb will turn on, "Ohmygosh, he's RIGHT. He IS winning!"

  2. Yes, no fans = no fame. Perhaps he should change his name again, this time to 'Ego Estevez' or 'Clueless Sheen'?

    Still feel bad for his kids tho.
    Do they ever look -happy- in a photo with him?...